In Room 1 we have been doing descriptive writing. I chose to write about Winter. I enjoyed describing the mountains. I found it hard to find the right words to use.
Outside, frosty frozen branches waved around in the air. Clouds covered the tip of the mountains that were snowy cold and numbing my feet. The silent sky was still and calm. As I ran inside I could still see the frosty frozen branches blowing in the air.
Outside, frosty frozen branches waved around in the air. Clouds covered the tip of the mountains that were snowy cold and numbing my feet. The silent sky was still and calm. As I ran inside I could still see the frosty frozen branches blowing in the air.
Hello. I am Harrison from Gisborne Intermediate School.
ReplyDeleteI Liked the topic that you went with because its a good thing even though it doesn't snow sadly but it’s great.
I Found interesting that.You describing about winter and yes winter is great so great job.
I Think you can improve on. You just might have to learn to put in descriptive language keep it up.
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Mā te wā
Harrison H
Hi I am Jahn from pompallier school kaitaia I liked your describing writing of the winter
ReplyDeleteHello Joan , I am Max from Pompallier Primary School. I would write about it to , because it is a awesome topic. Your writing was cool and had lots of descriptive words about winter .
ReplyDeleteKia ora Joan,
ReplyDeleteI liked all the adjectives and juicy verbs you used - it made me feel cold. What are you going to add to your success criteria next time?
Mā te wā,
Mrs Naden